Rumors of naughty clown capers annoy actual clowns, police

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When Doug Griffin lost his job at Delphi in 2008, he turned his 25-year hobby of acting as Feel N. Lucky the Happy Hobo Clown into a full-time laughmaker.

His outrageous, painted-on white smile sags a bit these days.

“It’s sad that people are abusing the forum,” said Griffin, of Miami County, reflecting on humorless hoaxes about ne’er-do-wells dressing and acting the part of crazed, manic clowns.

“Clowns should be happy,” Griffin said. “Kids should enjoy the institution.”

Police stations and newsrooms — including this one and those of its sister stations and newspapers — across the country have been flooded in recent days by these rumors of horror, which many law enforcement agencies have denounced as just that: Rumors.

Nevertheless, police have found themselves responding to the calls, often without a successful apprehension of the alleged menacing merrymakers. Take, for instance, the group of children who called the Brookville Police Department reporting a clown running around in the woods near their home. Police gave search, but only found empty Halloween masks.

And with Halloween approaching, police in Fairborn and Troy are issuing reminders that an increase in clown attire could simply be a sign of the season.

“Numerous rumors have been circulating locally about people in clown masks with apparent evil intentions,” Troy Police wrote on Facebook, noting no criminal clown capers are confirmed. “If a person wearing a mask is seen and causes concern, please call 911 and an officer will respond to investigate.”

There’s a warning, too, that such fear-mongering from false funnymen could be fatal.

“For you that think its funny to dress up as a clown, scare drivers on dark roadways, chase people with things that resemble weapons … TAKE HEED: This warning is for YOU …” wrote Darke County Sheriff Toby Spencer on Facebook.

“… yes you THE IDIOT!” the sheriff continued, “… as of today we have issued 6,125 (carrying a concealed weapon) permits in Darke County alone … just a number to consider the next time you think about donning your clown outfit, you might also ask yourself how your luck will be today!”

The post received more than 2,600 shares across the social media platform. “Good luck bringing in those idiots,” one woman wrote the sheriff in reply. Another, “Go for the JUGGLER!!”

Griffin, who still joyfully dresses as Lucky, said he’s hopeful the hubbub won’t hamper the happy.

“Everyone still loves me,” he said, “and still loves clowns.”